Self-help Author & Emotional Wellness Advocate
Hi, I’m Sandra – a self-help author and emotional wellness advocate. My mission is to guide others on their journey of healing, self-discovery, and empowerment. Through my books, I share wisdom, insights, and practical strategies that inspire personal growth, inner peace, and resilience during life’s transitions.
In addition to my writing, I create empowering resources such as free downloads, digital tools, and upcoming online courses, all designed to support you in cultivating self-worth, emotional freedom, and lasting happiness.
Having walked the path of deep healing myself, I understand the challenges that come with rebuilding after loss, hardship, or change. My work is rooted in compassion and authenticity, with the sole purpose of helping you reconnect with your true self and step into a brighter, more fulfilling future.
My ultimate goal is to help you experience:
Increased emotional resilience to navigate life’s challenges with greater strength.
Enhanced self-confidence to embrace your worth and potential.
Improved coping skills to move forward with clarity and peace.
Your growth and well-being are at the heart of everything I do. Through my words and resources, I hope to provide not only guidance but also encouragement – reminding you that transformation is possible and that you already hold the power to create the life you deserve.
Are you struggling to move on after divorce?
Do you feel sad, hurt and frustrated?
Do you feel lost, overwhelmed and confused?
In this book you will find answers to these questions and more.
Overcoming The Heartache of Divorce has all the advice you need to help you through the painful process of divorce. It contains valuable information that will help you transform your heartache into the happiness you desire. It includes simple strategies that will help you get results quickly; steps that will help you banish those negative emotions, let go of what’s keeping you stuck, raise your confidence and self-esteem, and also attain the clarity and strength you need to start creating the life you look forward to live. With a step by step guide you will start taking control of your emotions, overcome the heartache of your break-up, and move forward in a powerful way. I believe that if you read this book and follow the advice I share you will achieve emotional healing and personal transformation.
Start Working On Your Recovery!
You’re just one step away from starting your healing journey and changing your life. Imagine being able to:
Heal from your heartbreak faster Turn your despair into hope Take control of your emotions Have goals to look forward to Be in control of your life Have confidence and high self-esteem Start living life on your terms Feel free and happy again Turn your heartbreak into success
I will give you the exact steps to turn your surving mode into thriving mode. There’s no better time than now to start working on your recovery and take your life to the next level. When you work with me as your coach you will:
Learn to take control of your emotions instead of being controlled by them Gain clarity and strength to start creating the life you look forward to live Transform your heartache into the happiness you desire Adjust to your new life with ease and have a plan that will work best for you You will develop a forward focus mindset Learn how valuable and deserving you are of living a happy and fulfilling life Build a healthy & sustainable relationship with your kids; Learn how to cope with your ex Banish limiting beliefs and be prepared for a future relationship Rebuild your confidence – you’ll become invincible & unstoppable Claim your personal power and stay in control of your lifeTestemonials
How To Deal With Your Emotions And
Grieve Your Divorce
Divorce can be one of the most stressful and emotional experiences in life. It is heartbreaking, emotionally draining, and painfully disruptive for everyone involved. I know how it feels – I went through a difficult divorce seven years ago. Nothing can prepare you for the emotional aftermath, which often lasts weeks, months, or even years. Seeing your family fall apart is devastating. A roller coaster of raw emotions invades your being without warning, leaving behind chaos and heartbreak – whether you were the one initiating the breakup or not.
Sadness, frustration, disappointment, overwhelm, guilt, confusion, anger, and resentment often surface all at once, making it difficult to cope with the inner turmoil. Thoughts spin endlessly, nights are haunted by flashbacks, and the reality of your relationship being over feels surreal.
The pain doesn’t vanish just because the divorce is finalised. Even if you were the one who wanted it, the emotional toll remains. Divorce severs a deep attachment, and breaking that bond takes time. You must give yourself space to process and heal.
Take my story as an example. When my divorce was finalised, I thought I would feel free. For years, I had longed to leave, but instead of joy I felt immense sadness and emotional upheaval. After twenty-eight years of lies, betrayals, and mistreatment, I had finally found the courage to end it, yet I was devastated. I felt confused, angry, depressed, disappointed, and scared. Even though I tried to deny the pain, it was raw and real – stuck in my throat, in my chest, in my mind. It was hell for quite some time. But when I stopped running and finally accepted my pain, I began to find my way back to life.
Facing your emotions may feel frightening, but it is the only way to move through them. Grieving is natural and necessary. You must allow yourself to feel your sadness, anger, frustration – every single emotion. Grief is the heart’s way of restoring itself. It helps you confront conflicting feelings and accept the end of your relationship in a healthy way.
We grieve because we loved, or at least because we were deeply attached. Grief’s purpose is to mend your heart and bring you back to your natural state of peace. Each emotion carries a message. Instead of silencing them, ask: What are these feelings trying to tell me? How can I express them? Their very purpose is to ease your pain and guide you back to wholeness.
Still, many people hide their true emotions behind a mask of strength. I did this myself. I portrayed resilience for my children and those around me, while inside I was falling apart. Because I had initiated the breakup, I thought I wasn’t allowed to grieve. I suppressed my pain, pretending I was fine, but pretending only made me anxious and panicky. Eventually, I reached a breaking point. I could no longer escape my truth – I wasn’t okay. Healing only began when I faced my feelings honestly and gave myself permission to grieve.
Your healing begins the moment you stop avoiding your emotions. Whatever you feel is normal. You are not weak or a failure – you are a human being going through loss. You are grieving not only the end of a relationship but also the end of a family, the loss of dreams, and the vision of what could have been. Allow yourself to cry, to vent, to express your pain. Tears are your body’s natural way of releasing hurt. Write in a journal, talk to someone you trust, or walk in nature where your emotions can breathe. What matters most is that you face your feelings rather than bury them. If ignored, they resurface in destructive ways.
Common signs of avoidance include:
Throwing yourself into work nonstop
Escaping into addictions
Excessive partying
Rushing into another relationship
Overtraining at the gym
Emotional pain should never be ignored, just as you wouldn’t ignore physical pain. Suppressing it delays healing and often leads to deeper suffering. If coping alone feels overwhelming, consider seeking professional help. Support can guide you to a place where life feels hopeful again, even if you can’t see it now.
Healing after divorce is not about erasing the past but about finding perspective, accepting what has happened, and creating a new normal. With time, patience, and self-compassion, you will reach a place where life feels good again.
Contact me for further support.
Who Am I After Divorce?
After a break-up, the most important step is to rediscover who you are and what you want for your life. Once it’s over, you’ll find yourself picking up the pieces and beginning a new chapter. This is the right time to envision your future – to adjust, to reclaim your forgotten dreams, to do the things you couldn’t do while married, and to explore the world with fresh eyes.
But in order to step forward as a single woman and rebuild your life, you must take deliberate steps with patience and compassion for yourself. You carry wounds that need healing, emotions that need acknowledgment, and traumas that need release. To truly restart, there is one person you must prioritize above all else – you.
When my divorce was finalised, I knew the pain wasn’t in vain. Deep down, I believed I would eventually rise again. But in that moment, I needed to reconnect with the freedom of being single. I had been lost in my marriage for so long that I barely knew how to be myself without judgment or criticism. I had a lot of emotional “garbage” to clear before I could rebuild my confidence. Yet, I recognised the opportunity before me: a chance to reclaim my identity and make better choices for myself.
Here are some steps to help you defeat the pain of divorce and allow your true self to flourish:
1. Love Yourself First
Don’t turn against yourself after divorce. Loving yourself is the foundation of healing.
2. Find Yourself Again
Rediscovery takes time, patience, and self-care. Learn how to enjoy your own company again.
3. Do What You Love
Return to the activities and passions you once put aside. They are still part of you and can reignite your joy. Some ideas:
Go out with friends for coffee and conversation.
Join a fitness or dance class (Zumba was mine!).
Take long walks while listening to uplifting music.
Travel and explore new places.
Learn something new that excites you.
Spend time at the beach, grounding yourself in nature.
When the time is right, open yourself to love again.
Life is full of adventures waiting for you.
4. Meet a New Side of Yourself
Divorce creates space for growth. Ask yourself: What parts of me do I want to bring forward? What hidden sides of me deserve to shine? Some ideas include:
Discovering hidden talents.
Volunteering or giving back.
Creating healthy new habits.
5. Don’t Be Afraid to Be Single
There is nothing to fear about being single. It’s a powerful time to transform and create a better version of yourself:
Physically: eat well, move your body, care for your health.
Mentally: nurture thoughts that serve you, shift your mindset.
Spiritually: pray, meditate, walk in nature, or practice yoga.
6. Take Time Before a New Relationship
It can be tempting to jump into another relationship right away, but healing first is essential. Don’t feel pressured – being single has its own gifts. Once you’ve rebuilt your sense of self, you’ll be in the best place to make healthy choices about whether to date again or stay single. Remember: it’s your life, and you’re in control.
A New Beginning
Divorce is not a failure – it’s a solution to a problem. Marriage takes two, and if one is deeply unhappy, both suffer. While divorce feels like the end of the world, it is also the beginning of a new life.
Now is the time to rebuild your identity and self-esteem. You may feel lost or unsure where to start, but this is your opportunity to reflect and ask yourself:
Who am I?
What do I love to do?
How do I want to feel?
Who do I want to become?
What qualities within me do I want to grow and express?
How do I want to show up in the world?
How do I want to experience and express myself?
Where do I want to be in this new chapter of my life?
These questions will help you find clarity and create your “what now” after divorce. Take this time to rebuild, re-emerge, and step into the best version of yourself – the version you were always meant to be.
If you need further support please feel free to contact me.
Is Your Divorce Making You Feel Antisocial?
After a painful breakup, you need time to process what happened and to decide how to move forward. No matter the circumstances, your feelings are valid. Give yourself the space and distance you need to recompose. Recovery is not instant – it’s a process. Acknowledging that truth will help you create a healthy and authentic path toward growth and healing. Don’t feel guilty for needing solitude. Allow the sadness, hurt, anger, frustration, fear – even hate – to surface. Face them, experience them, and move through them. Be as compassionate with yourself as you would be with a dear friend whose heart had just been broken.
While staying busy can be helpful later in the healing journey, immediately after a breakup you often need alone time to grieve. If you feel overwhelmed or lost, it’s perfectly okay to step back from your social life. It’s okay not to answer the phone. It’s okay to want to be on your own. You are repairing yourself, processing what has happened, and putting your thoughts in order.
I remember how I shut down from the world while trying to understand what was happening inside me. “I just want to be left alone,” I kept thinking. I didn’t want to talk to anyone, visit family, or meet with friends. I declined invitations to gatherings and parties – the last thing I wanted was to act happy when I felt broken inside. I didn’t want to be seen as a victim, so it felt better to withdraw. That time became my therapy. I knew I would be fine eventually, but in that moment I needed space to heal, and solitude felt right. Later, when I explained this to my loved ones, they understood.
It’s okay not to be okay. Again, healing begins with acceptance – with allowing your emotions to flow. Don’t be afraid to feel the pain; it will linger longer if you avoid it. I often remind people: you have to feel it, to deal with it, in order to heal from it. You can’t heal without dealing with it, and you can’t deal with it without first identifying what you’re feeling. Be present with your emotions. You can’t outrun them – they are already inside you. Give yourself permission to mourn.
It’s okay – you will be okay. Sooner than you expect, you’ll find yourself thriving again, feeling alive again. Healing happens one day at a time. Breakups are painful, even when handled with compassion. They shake you at your core and can make you question your confidence and your faith in love itself. In those first brutal days and weeks, you have every right to feel inconsolable. But with time, patience, and self-kindness, you will stand strong again – and look forward to a new life ahead.
If you need further support please feel free to contact me.
Are You Feeling Resentful Towards Your Ex?
Divorce often comes with a flood of strong emotions – resentment, anger, and a mountain of painful memories that leave you hurt and devastated.
Whatever you went through in your marriage, no matter how terrible, your pain is valid. You are hurt for a reason. Much of the anguish comes from the deep sense of having lost control over what happened. That loss of control cuts to the core, leaving wounds that are difficult to bear. The pain of the original offense – combined with the weight of anger and resentment – can easily drag you toward bitterness. Left unchecked, it leaves you powerless and unhappy. Unless you face it, you risk living in misery forever.
When my marriage ended, I was drowning in resentment. I had a thousand reasons to be hurt. After twenty-eight years filled with betrayals, lies, and both physical and emotional abuse, my mind was crowded with painful memories. I didn’t know how to grieve, or even where to start. I knew I had to let go, but I didn’t know how – and if I’m honest, I wasn’t sure I even wanted to. He didn’t deserve forgiveness, or so I thought. But I wanted to heal. I couldn’t bear the pain anymore. I wished the memories would vanish. I wanted to feel numb, to feel nothing at all. But denial didn’t work. Running away didn’t work. The only way forward was through – I had to face every painful emotion and acknowledge the truth.
That’s when my healing began: the moment I admitted what I was truly going through. Tears poured endlessly, pain and confusion tangled together. I wanted to forgive but couldn’t figure out how. My mind kept asking, “How can I forgive and let go if…?” There were too many ifs.
Everything shifted when I replaced the ifs with because.
“I let go because I deserve to be happy again,” I sobbed.
“I let go because I deserve a second chance at life.”
“I let go because I deserve to love again.”
“I let go because my past does not define me, and I have a damn good future ahead of me!”
A huge weight lifted off my chest. For the first time in decades, I felt free. That was the moment I could begin again – with resilience and strength.
There’s a huge misunderstanding about forgiveness. Many believe it means accepting someone’s apology or excusing what they did. But forgiveness is not about them – it’s about you. It doesn’t mean you have to reconcile, become friends, or pretend what happened was okay. Forgiveness simply means you no longer deserve to carry the burden of pain. You don’t even have to tell the person you forgive them. Forgiveness is a choice you make inside yourself: “I choose to let go, not because they deserve it, but because I deserve peace.”
What you want now is to reclaim your power and take control of your new life. Forgiveness is an act of strength, not weakness. It allows you to recognize the harm that was done to you, while refusing to relive it again and again. You forgive not for their sake, but for yours – because you deserve to feel good, to be free, and to live fully.
Holding onto anger and resentment only poisons you. The original wound hurt enough – you don’t need to keep reopening it. Resentment keeps you stuck in patterns of pain, making you feel fragile, powerless, and insecure. It drains your energy, steals your joy, and robs you of the beauty that could be filling your life instead – new dreams, new love, and new possibilities.
Resentment is giving your power away to the very person who hurt you. Why let them live rent-free in your mind, stealing your present and your future? The minimum you can do for yourself after all you’ve endured is to stop reliving those old wounds.
The beauty of forgiveness is that – even if it doesn’t lead to hugs or reconciliation – it frees you. It places you in a better state of mind, a place where you can live with harmony, happiness, and hope.
You are in a new chapter now, with a long life ahead and countless beautiful experiences waiting for you. Let go of resentment. Embrace forgiveness – not as a gift to them, but as a gift to yourself. Step into freedom, into peace, and into the life you truly deserve.
If you need further support please feel free to contact me.
3 Steps
3 Steps System To Your Breakthrough
Step 1
We will work on helping you understand and take control of your emotions, to transform your heartache in to the happiness you desire.
Step 2
We will work together on planning your future and create goals that will help you move towards the life you look forward to live.
